the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
