can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize