Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
