what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
