It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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