Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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