Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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