I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Randomize
