Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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