Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
