You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
