its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
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