Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Randomize
