i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
