hotel room ftw
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
