I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
