it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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