I wish I could teleport
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize