Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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