i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize
