everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
