im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize