just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
i out mim tonsoeep
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