I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
