I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
