Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
