I accidentally had phone sex last night
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
