So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
