It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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