I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
