so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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