I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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