its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize