we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
