Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
