Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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