I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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