Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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