A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
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