Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize