I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
