i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
She announced her abortion via fbk
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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