I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
