508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
