I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
