The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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