I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
