it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
