I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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