dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
