I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize